Dramatic Monotony

Sunday, November 24, 2002

Update: No, it didn't all happen.

fucla was amazing. I loved being in the Rose Bowl and watching our team DOMINATE the bRuins. Fabulous stuff there. I even started a fight with one of the ucla fans. Unintentionally, of course... he was in my way, so I had every right to push him... correct? The only disappointing aspect of the game was the utter rudeness of the Song Girls on the ride up. A girl was hairspraying her hair on the bus, a common sense no-no in my book. A few of our girls have asthma, which is irritated by the fumes, so our section leader asked her to stop. Well... she didn't. So, Andrea asked again, rather politely. This girl screams, "FINE, I'M STOPPING ALREADY. I GET THE POINT." *Then* she proceeds to bitch to her seatmate about how fat the Silks are, how she's glad that the band doesn't have any rude songs about the song girls, and how much superior they are to us, etc. ... umm... does anyone see the correlation between hairspray and fatness? We weren't being rude, but she sat there and completely ripped on us as she was sitting in the row in front of one of our freshmen. What a bitch. This is how they get the reputation of stuck-up prissies.

Today was Amy's birthday party. Here's a picture of us. And yes, Amy and I match on purpose! I really love my dress. It's beautiful, but more importantly, it makes me feel like a princess. And it was my (early!) Christmas present from my parents. We had a ton of fun today, but now I'm paying for it... I have WAY too much work.

Wednesday, November 20, 2002

Plan for tomorrow:

1. Wake up at 8 am and take a shower.
2. Be in THH 116 at 9:25, exactly five minutes before class starts.
3. Make a kick-ass presentation with Meredith and Seanne. Get Kincaid to laugh.
4. Get out of class at 10:45, and come home. Work on ENGL 261 essay for thirty minutes. Develop some sort of thesis or outline.
5. Pick up Kathleen at Webb then head over to the Beverly Center. Go to Macy's to pick up expensive dress, then buy Sam and Amy birthday presents.
6. Eat lunch at CPK at 12:30.
7. Come home around 1:30 and pack bag for Troy Rally. Include makeup, camera, booty pants, band shirt, performance flag.
8. Go to band office with aforementioned bag and pole. Get Notre Dame ticket for my mother. Put that in bag ready to bring home and put in a SAFE place.
9. Attend band practice. Kick major booty in drill and flag work. Yell a lot about bRuins.
10. Troy Rally - meet at Del Taco after getting dressed. Maybe grab some dinner?
11. Go to Episcopalian meeting from 8-9.
12. Finish paper, and go to bed.

Will this happen? Hopefully, but... probably not. There's just not enough time in the day.

Monday, November 18, 2002

I feel much better.

I took a three hour nap. And I didn't shop at all today!

I'm a mess.

I think I should sleep. And stop shopping.

Sunday, November 17, 2002

Warning: Please excuse the overly melodramatic tone of this post. I'm running on very little sleep, and I have an urge to say this for no particular reason.

Form Letter for Soured Relationships
"Dear _____

You don't like me. I know this, you know this. It's a proven fact. In fact, you've consistantly gone out of your way to piss me off, to belittle me, and to make me feel like shit. Whether through ignoring my existence or calling me names, you've pushed the right buttons. You got under my skin. I SHOULD despise you with the entirety of my soul. And for a while, I think I did.

But right now, it's too much hassle. I can't do it anymore. I just can't be mean. I just can't be a bitch. I just can't stoop to your level. Even the idea of continuing the pretense drains me. And when I see you looking frustrated and upset, I can't stand back and laugh at your misery. I truly care about you and your problems, even though you could care less about me. And you know what? This is okay. I wish I could summon up enough courage to say this to your face. But right now, I don't think you'd understand. You'd probably think this is some sort of devious ploy to wreck your life. It's not, I promise.

I wish we didn't have to spend our time posturing. It reeks of "tragedy."

I guess what I'm trying to say is... I don't hate you. Even though I don't know if we could ever be friends, I wanted you to know that I feel an affinity for you, and I don't see that changing. That's all.


Friday, November 15, 2002

It's 4 o'clock in the morning. So I started thinking...

It's funny how the people who truly impact your life tend to come and go. A boy named Bryan and a boy named Robert probably changed my entire outlook during the summer before my junior year of high school. I only knew them for three weeks. But during those three weeks, I became an entirely different person. I wonder how my life would've gone if I had met one of them at college. Or in a different context. Would we have the same bond? Would it be as amazing?

I think I'm still waiting to meet them again. I want cloned versions of Robert and Bryan running around the USC campus. They were sweet, intelligent, funny, cute, and slightly offbeat. As I sit in the Commons, I watch strangers walk by, and I wonder if they possess any of these qualities. Or all of them? It's entirely possible that I'm missing out on some of the best possible friends in my life because I don't make an effort to talk to people. Am I in a rut? I think so.

What brought this on? Well, Jay's profile has this interesting site listed. It reminded me of a particular incident while punting on the River Cam. I was actually doing the hard labor of punting, but Robert, Bryan, Robert, Scott, and Jordan were beatboxing, creating some of the most amazing music I've ever heard. Entirely with their voices. I had NEVER heard anything quite like this before... and I haven't heard anything quite like it since.

Last I heard, Robert was at Oberlin and loving it while Bryan was partying it up at Georgetown. Who knows where they are now?

Here's how I remember Bryan:

And here's a picture of Robert, Bryan, and Scott goofing off while watching the bumps:

Saturday, November 02, 2002

I'm sorry about keeping you in suspense...

My weekend... wasn't debauched at all! It was so much fun!

For the uninformed, I went on a retreat for my CORE 101 class to Big Bear. We stayed in these HUGE luxury cabins in the mountains, and I have to say, I had a blast. I wasn't expecting much when I left - I wasn't really good friends with anyone in my class. But I totally bonded with the other members. I slept in a room with the quieter girls - Modupe, Lauren, Heather, and Julia. That Friday night, we just gabbed and gossiped until all hours. Then, on Saturday, I went bowling with Meredith, Lindsey, and Liz in town. I enjoyed Big Bear - it was a cute little village with lots of fun coffee shops and restaurants. The best part of the retreat was our sing-along after the presentations at night. Three hours of the most RANDOM group singing Pink Floyd, oldies, kid's songs, etc. The next day, we cleaned up the house and split! I'm sure I'll refer to this retreat in future entries. It was definitely a bonding experience for our class. I loved the "oral traditions" with Evan, swapping band stories with Lauren, debating movies with Brian, dissecting the binaries involved in our daily lives... it was truly wonderful. I have lots of pictures, which I will eventually put into a photo album of some sort. I'll keep you updated on that front.